Sports

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  • It is pleasing to God whenever you rejoice or laugh from the bottom of your heart.
        Martin Luther   Best?
  • You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh - it's as simple as that.
        Jay Leno   Best?
  • Never be afraid to laugh at yourself, after all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.
        Dame Edna Everage   Best?
  • Wear a smile and have friends,
        Georges Eliot   Best?
  • We shall find no fiend in hell can match the fury of a disappointed woman,—scorned, slighted, dismissed without a parting pang.
        Colley Cibber   Best?
  • Skiing consists of wearing $3,000 worth of clothes and equipment and driving 200 miles in the snow in order to stand around at a bar and drink.
        P. J. O'Rourke   Best?
  • If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater, suggest that he wear a tail.
        Fran Leibowitz   Best?
  • I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.
        Fran Leibowitz   Best?
  • The dance is a poem of which each movement is a word.
        Mata Hari   Best?
  • At any rate, I am convinced that He [God] does not play dice.
        Albert Einstein   Best?
  • Let the punishment match the offense.
        Cicero   Best?
  • We are the hero of our own story.
        Mary McCarthy   Best?
  • Very little is known of the Canadian country since it is rarely visited by anyone but the Queen and illiterate sport fishermen.
        P. J. O'Rourke   Best?
  • [George Bush] has raised taxes on the people driving pickup trucks and lowered taxes on the people riding in limousines. We can do better.
        Bill Clinton   Best?
  • Being a woman is of special interest to aspiring male transexuals. To actual women it is simply a good excuse not to play football.
        Fran Leibowitz   Best?
  • He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hope for the human condition is a fool.
        Soren Kierkegaard   Best?
  • When in doubt, duck.
        Malcolm Forbes   Best?
  • When a man wants to murder a tiger he calls it sport; when a tiger wants to murder him he calls it ferocity.
        George Bernard Shaw   Best?
  • Perhaps I know best why it is man alone who laughs; he alone suffers so deeply that he had to invent laughter.
        Frederich Nietzsche   Best?
  • A cap of good acid costs five dollars and for that you can hear the Universal Symphony with God singing solo and the Holy Ghost on drums.
        Hunter S. Thompson   Best?
  • While hunting in Africa, I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How an elephant got into my pajamas I'll never know.
        Groucho Marx   Best?
  • REQUIEM, n. A mass for the dead which the minor poets assure us the winds sing o'er the graves of their favorites. Sometimes, by way of providing a varied entertainment, they sing a dirge.
        Ambrose Bierce   Best?
  • PIG, n. An animal (_Porcus omnivorus_) closely allied to the human race by the splendor and vivacity of its appetite, which, however, is inferior in scope, for it sticks at pig.
        Ambrose Bierce   Best?
  • I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.
        Kurt Vonnegut   Best?
  • A tart temper never mellows with age; and a sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use.
        Washington Irving   Best?
  • The action of men are the best interpreters of their thoughts.
        John Locke   Best?
  • And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.
        Kahlil Gibran   Best?
  • Blessed are we who can laugh at ourselves for we shall never cease to be amused.
        Unknown   Best?
  • The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the scythe.
        Old Russian saying   Best?
  • And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow.
        Jerry Chin   Best?
  • Don't let people drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance.
        Unknown   Best?
  • Always behave like a duck - keep calm and unruffled on the surface but paddle like the devil underneath.
        Jacob Braude   Best?
  • The only reason we're 7-0 is because we've won all seven of our games.
        David Garcia   Best?
  • Someday they're gonna write a blues song just for fighters. It'll be for slow guitar, soft trumpet, and a bell.
        Sonny Liston   Best?
  • It's easier to win a chess game in five minutes than it is to talk about Russia's problems in 15 minutes
        Garry Kasparov   Best?
  • My prerogative right now is to just chill and let all the other overexposed blondes on the cover of Us Weekly (magazine) be your entertainment.
        Britney Spears   Best?
  • It hurts to find out that what you wanted doesn't match what you dreamed it would be.
        Randy K. Milholland   Best?
  • If you have an apple and I have an apple and we exchange apples then you and I will still each have one apple. But if you have an idea and I have an idea and we exchange these ideas, then each of us will have two ideas.
        George Bernard Shaw   Best?
  • You've achieved success in your field when you don't know whether what you're doing is work or play.
        Warren Beatty   Best?
  • Sports serve society by providing vivid examples of excellence.
        George F. Will   Best?

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